Monthly Archives September 2012


September 21, 2012 Uncategorized  2 comments

I had someone ask me very lately about punishment.

It was hard for him, he said, because his “emotions” always got in the way when he was going to punish his girl.

My advice wasn’t that helpful, I suspect, because I’m not big on punishment, per se.

You punish for willful disobedience, or lack of attention when you should expect it, things that are either deliberate or so avoidable as to BE deliberate.  You don’t punish for mistakes, and you don’t punish for fun.

Because, see, if you punish for fun, it’s no longer punishment, and that’s fine, but just call it what it is, play.

I told him, too, that you don’t threaten punishments that you can’t mete out.  If you say, if you do X, then I will do this Y, then, should X occur, you had best be damned well prepared and willing to do Y.

If I sho...

Read More

Cooler Nights

September 19, 2012 Uncategorized  5 comments

When I first typed that, I actually had “Cooker Nights,” which made no sense at all.

In sort of that same vein, last night I was texting a friend and typed “brick and mortar,” but the auto-correct changed it to, I swear, “brick and Mitterand.”

You know, François Mitterrand the, 21st President of the French Republic.

And no, I did not already know that 23rd thing, I had to look up how to spell his first name and thought I’d through in the rest of the sentence.

Because, see, while I don’t KNOW for sure that I have ever texted the word “mortar” before, at least on this phone, I can absolutely assure you I have never in my entire life texted the name Mitterand.

Why on earth would iPhone pick THAT name out of the blue to add to that sentence.  “Brick and Mitterand.”  Sounds like a law firm.

Read More

September 18

September 18, 2012 Uncategorized  7 comments


I forgot to post yesterday!

I mean, I haven’t posted every single day, but I’ve posted most days, then this morning I realized I’d missed it.

Oh, well.

So, I’m still musing over the weekend.  One of the interesting moments was during one of the contestant’s presentation.  Ian was explaining how big a deal small things that non-gender-challenged (I think I made up a term there, bear with me) take for granted can be, things like medical issues and which bathroom to use.

Ian explained that his name at birth was Nancy Grace, and that Ian was really an acronym for I am Nancy, because that person was still inside him, he hadn’t really changed...

Read More

Georgia on my Mind

September 16, 2012 Uncategorized  No comments

We got back from Atlanta about a half hour ago.

We had a fun time at Leather Bash – it was small, but I had a chance to meet some new people and catch up with some old friends.

Leather Bash and the International Transgender Leather Contest is produced by Wayne Brawner, someone who would, I think, describe himself as a modern primitive, at least in terms of my understanding of the term.  If you’d like to see a short bio and photo of him, it’s here.

He’s tattooed and pierced and can be quite intimidating. He is also the only person in my memory to ever call me kitten.

He is one of my contacts on Facebook and that’s usually how he contacts me.  He sent me a message asking for a bio of myself and Ms Tammy, so I pulled that and sent it and he responded, “Thank you, kitten.”

I blinked, re-read...

Read More

Marching through Georgia

September 15, 2012 Uncategorized  No comments

We are arrived in Atlanta and comfortably settled in our hotel, the four of us.

The drive down was uneventful; we stopped north of Nashville at a Mexican restaurant, which was fine.

The room is fine, although there was not a night stand on my side of the bed, which I really have to have.

There was also nothing that would work, no extra chair or trash can.

Hence the ironing board beside my bed.

And, on that note’ good night.

Read More

A Weekend in Atlanta

September 14, 2012 Uncategorized  3 comments

Tomorrow afternoon, four of us are setting off to the LeatherBash in Atlanta.

Ms Tammy and her slave, troy, are heading there with me and slave drew.  slave thomas was going to go with me but wasn’t able to take the time right now, which is a disappointment, but it will be fun to have drew, too.  He lived in Atlanta for about a year, so he at least knows his way more or less around.

She and I are doing our Humor in the Lifestyle presentation, which we’ve not done for a while.  We’ll leave about 3-ish, which will put us into Atlanta, with a stop or two, around 9-ish.

Ms Kendra and her slave, garrett, will also be there, so we’ll have some time to catch up, too, after GLLA.

I’ve gone to South East Leather Fest in Atlanta a few times...

Read More


September 12, 2012 Uncategorized  4 comments

Charisma is something I was talking about tonight with a friend – perhaps he’ll recognize himself here – and it made me think about the kinds of charisma I’ve seen.

Charisma isn’t about good looks, it’s about maybe a kind of intensity, or the kind of personality that is larger than life.  Someone who puts out a bit more wattage, or takes up a little more space than the rest of the room.

To me, charisma is the quality of being the person that people want to watch in a room, the one that they check in with and watch, even if it’s not obvious.

Some people have natural charisma, I think.  You’ve seen them.  They’re the striking woman you see across a restaurant and notice, or the arresting-looking man on the elevator and eavesdrop on his phone conversation.

Some people can turn on charisma...

Read More

If I Could Save Time…

September 11, 2012 Uncategorized  2 comments

I was – still am, for that matter – a big fan of Jim Croce, who wrote some words that I think of often.  “There never seems to be enough time to do the things you want to do, once you find them.”  Isn’t that the truth?

See, I meant to write a longish blog tonight about this bizarre deck of Tarot cards, fraught with both clever word plays and insightful conclusions, perhaps even pulling the same card from all those decks and comparing and contrasting, and then there was the great mouse caper.

Or not so great.

Let’s call it the – so far – the so-so mouse caper.

My littlest Scottie, Bess, is the huntress of the three, though to be fair Belle is pretty deaf and Reigh only has one eye, so the competition isn’t that stiff.  Plus they don’t much care, mouses gotta eat, too, yanno.

Anyway, Bess...

Read More

Tarot Cards

September 10, 2012 Uncategorized  No comments

I have, sitting in front of me, a deck of Tarot cards I bought at a yard sale this weekend for a quarter.  By odd coincidence they’d been separated from the book that went with it at a largish church yard sale this past weekend and it wasn’t until I got home that I realized by complete chance I had found both of them.

There are two things I will always buy at yard sales, if they’re $1 or less.  One is handwork like embroidered tea towels or dresser scarves or tablecloths.  I know that some woman sat with a needle and thread, spent her spare time making something pretty, chose to do that rather than read or sleep or relax, so I pick them up.

The other thing is a decks of Tarot cards...

Read More

Sugar and Spice

September 9, 2012 Uncategorized  One comment

It’s funny to me how much our gender affects how we act and react, even in this allegedly enlightened and liberated age.

To be clear, I’m not saying, doesn’t it suck that women STILL earn less then men over all, nor am I denying that there is a clear and obvious gender-bias in laws and that I disagree with them vehemently.

What I am saying, though, is that however little we may like stereotypes and however damaging they may well be in some areas and ways, they are stereotypes for a reason.  Not all women think the same way, but most women have some things in common, and the same could be said of men.

I think being a female dominant has some essential differences from being a male dominant.

Of course, I’ve never actually been a male dominant, so I have to speculate, but I’m a pretty astute...

Read More