Passages

January 15, 2013 MemoriesRelationshipsVanilla Life  13 comments

It has been a strange few days in several ways.

I had gotten a letter earlier this week from the daughter of a woman I grew up with.  She was a friend of my mother’s, though, over time, she became more a friend of mine.

I had visited her when we were on our honeymoon and went back to my hometown.  She was Portuguese in heritage, and an artist.  She and her husband owned a little junk shop in the town I grew up in, a place that we visited regularly.

She sold comics and books and I remember taking old ones in and trading them for different used books and comics.

It was in her store that I clearly remember seeing a rhinestone brooch and telling my mother how pretty it would be on a black dress.

I was all of nine or ten and I remember my mother saying, “But you don’t HAVE a black dress.”

I ...

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Father B

January 14, 2013 Memoriesslave drewVanilla Life  6 comments

I am going to post tonight something I wrote earlier today.

The minister who married us is leaving the church.

Yes, I was married in a church and the ceiling did not fall down on us.

I wore a leather pillbox hat and leather gloves I’d been given as a piece of earned leather.

I’m not really a Christian at all – I don’t honestly know how I’d define myself, it changes nearly daily.  But we both wanted a fairly traditional ceremony, none of the unity candle and vows we wrote ourselves.

slave drew grew up in an Episcopalian church, and that was where we went to be married.

We were very lucky, our minister was a lovely man, and a wonderful speaker, and is now leaving us for the greener pastures I always knew would beckon.

We in the congregation were asked to write something for him to...

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One of Those Days

January 13, 2013 Bluegrass Leather PrideEventsFringe ElementsGreat Lakes Leather AllianceKink EventsVanilla Life  16 comments

Ever have one of those days?

It began with a LARGE dog mess that had to be cleaned up.  A mess that spanned two rooms.  First thing.

I’ve worked on laundry all day, which I honestly don’t mind, but it’s been a lot of steps up and down stairs, since the laundry is in the basement.  There has also been moving the clean clothes up to the upstairs, another flight.

I feel as though I’ve been doing a stair master all day, and while that’s not bad, my joints are beginning to protest.

I had another mess to clean up when the big plastic container of liquid laundry detergent somehow fell off the dryer, breaking the screw top, and spewing a certain amount of soap over the dryer, the washer, and some of the clean clothes.

Then there was the large pool of detergent on the floor.

I got it cleaned up,...

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Post Party

January 12, 2013 Bluegrass Leather PrideFringe ElementsKink CommunityKink EventsPlay Parties  5 comments

Had I been smart, I would have written a blog post before heading out to the Fringe Elements Taster’s Choice party last night.

I thought of that about the same time I realized that I had forgotten the mascara.  It was too late to go back and do it by then.

So the party went well.  We had about 120 people, which is a good sized party.  Our class lineup was Rope Bondage by Robyn, Boot Massage by Bootblack Bella, Therapeutic Massage by Kristin, Intro to Canes by Ms Constance – yours truly – Intro to Flogging by GypsyPony, Hot Safe Sex by Leather Queer, Intro to Electrical Play by Sir Russ, Intro to Knife Play by Sir Charles, Rough Body Play by Walter Sobchak, Intro to Needles by Ms Tammy, Intro to Littles Play by Johnnie and Maggie, and Massage for Doms by Shawna the Dead.

Most classes ran...

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Indolence

January 10, 2013 slave drewVanilla Life  2 comments

I have had an unusually lazy day, in some ways..  slave drew had a minor procedure yesterday and I’ve spent most of my day laying in bed with him, watching television.

I did run an errand or two, and made a rather lovely dinner of a fish casserole with olives and garlic and potatoes and lemon.  I’m also looking after a friend’s dogs while they’re out of town for a couple of days.  I do need to run out and take care of them shortly.

I rarely have the kind of day that involves watching a move or two, a longish nap this morning, and the seeming inability to do ANYTHING of any value.

Although, having written my own blog about accepting quiet as a time to recharge, perhaps I should just shut up and enjoy, huh?

 

 

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Routine

January 9, 2013 Bluegrass Leather Prideslave drewVanilla Life  4 comments

I am sitting in bed, with slave drew, watching television and generally hanging out, something we rarely do.

He is playing on his Kindle, surfing and at this moment translating a German phrase of some sort.  He tells me it says, I am very cute, smart, clever, sympathetic, pretty and arrogant on top of it.

I think you have to be German for it to make sense.

We are watching Midsomer Murders, one of our BBC mysteries, about which it always strikes us that so many people could be murdered in these sleepy English villages and there still be enough to put on the next year’s church fete.

I am drinking a lovely tea, a black one made with rose petals and tiny buds.  It would likely be too flowery for most people, but I’m quite fond of it.  It smells like a bouquet of roses.

I spent some time tod...

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A Poetic Interlude

January 8, 2013 NaturePoetry  8 comments

I couldn’t think of anything I wanted to write about, and a poem came to mind, so I decided to do that, instead.

This is a poem that I think of in winter, always, I’m not sure why.  Wendell Berry is a definitively Kentucky writer, one I saw speak a few years ago.

The Peace of Wild Things

When despair for the world grows in me
and I wake in the night at the least sound
in fear of what my life and my children’s lives may be,
I go and lie down where the wood drake
rests in his beauty on the water, and the great heron feeds.
I come into the peace of wild things
who do not tax their lives with forethought
of grief. I come into the presence of still water.
And I feel above me the day-blind stars
waiting with their light. For a time
I rest in the grace of the world, and am free.

– Wendell Berr...

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Nothing is Wasted

January 7, 2013 RelationshipsSpiritualityVanilla Life  5 comments

I spent some time today going through an old hard drive.

I found several things I’d been looking for, including, hallelujah, that story about the cat named Stiletto.

It needs a bit of reworking, the place it ended up was a bit different than the place it began and I want to work on it a bit, but I am much happier to have found it.

I found some other things, too, some bits and pieces of writing, some things that I was glad to find, some I’d forgotten, some I’d remembered but given up on.

One of the things I found was something I’d written about advice, and one part of it in particular struck me.

Someone a long time ago gave me a lot of good advice, but one of the ones I had mostly forgotten was, “Nothing is wasted.”

Everything prepares us for the next thing.

Our lives are linear; we can...

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Saturday Munch

January 6, 2013 EventsFringe ElementsLouisville Munch  2 comments

Last night was the January Saturday Munch, the first munch of 2013, the first month of our 16th year.

That alone still seems amazing.

Both Friday and Saturday munch were large ones, which is usually the case.

I think the reason is at least two-fold.

On one hand, I think people by January have gotten through the work parties and the family parties and all the holiday festivities.

Families are not always easy for kinky people.  We often feel as though we don’t fit in, as though we’re aliens at the table, or at least I do, and I doubt I’m alone there.

We spend time trying to blend and when we can stop it’s a relief and we go back to being who we are with the people we want to be.

Secondly, I think it has a lot to do with resolutions.

I think for a lot of people, one of the resolutions they m...

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Commands

January 5, 2013 DominanceKink and BDSMRelationships  9 comments

One of the topics that’s been discussed some lately is the fact that sometimes dominants give commands that don’t quite seem like commands.

aisha talked about commands that were almost couched as suggestions, as did faithful in her blog.

I suppose that must seem very odd to submissives, that we do that.  We can, so easily it seems, just give that command.

We can TELL you what to do.

So why don’t we just TELL you sometimes?

There’s often a reason, you know.

You could do your child’s math homework.  You know, at least one hopes you know, how to do fractions.  If you were looking to solve the problem of the answer to the equation of 2 2/3 times 3 and 3/8ths, you understand the process.

You find the common denominator and translate the equations into those common denominators, you multiply ...

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